Who needs toenails in Malaysia anyway?

It’s been nearly a week since I arrived in Malaysia. It is so radically different from everything I’ve ever known. Lonely Planet does not do justice to the sights, sounds and smells of this beautiful country.

Malaysia is a Muslim country comprised of three distinct groups – the Malays, Chinese and Indian. It is not uncommon to be on one street and see people in full coverings eating Roti and daal and then hop over to the next street and see hanging chickens.

The juxtaposition between traditional and modern is incredible. I was walking along a nearby street last night – it was dirty (the sewage systems are all above ground here) and bustling with people everywhere. Guess what music I heard playing from a nearby sari stall? “Heartless” by Kanye West! Kanye West in Malaysia! Believe it or not, Kanye West does not even make the billboard charts here. The hottest acts around are Taylor Swift, Celine Dion and the Bee Gees. Teenaged boys here proudly know the words to “Stayin’ Alive” and “My Heart Will Go On” - and they find every opportunity to show you.

I think I’ve adjusted fairly well to life out here. But there are some things that I’m certain will take years to figure out:

Driving
Think the streets of New York combined with the Don Valley Parkway…but twenty times worse! First off, they drive on the wrong side of the road. I keep getting into the car on the driver’s side by accident (like I would ever attempt to drive in this country…ha!). There’s traffic everywhere, all the time. Motorbikes seem to think the rules of the road don’t apply to them. No one signals. Everyone honks.

You’d think with so many cars, the parking system would be impeccable. But this is definitely not the case. There are no parking lots in Malaysia, which means that everyone parallel parks along the street, in the middle of the street…really, wherever they please. I have enough trouble parking in Toronto. There is absolutely no way I could navigate the streets of Malaysia – I’m not that crazy!

Time
I thought 21 years of experience with Khoja time would give me a leg up in this area. But nothing can quite prepare you for Malaysian time. If you’re supposed to meet someone at 6pm for a dinner date and by 8pm he still hasn’t shown up, fret not! He has not stood you up and he is by no means a jerk – he is simply Malaysian. I wonder if I can use this excuse for handing in late assignments at school…

Manglish
Malay is the official language of Malaysia however, English is widely spoken. And then there is a Manglish – a sort of hybrid that sometimes resembles Latin more than it does the other two. Every sentence ends with the word “laah”. “Don’t want, laah”. “Please, laah”. “It’s so hot, laah”. That’s my new found mission for Malaysia: figure out what “laah” means. Not a bad idea, eh?

The schools are influenced by the UK educational system so many of the words used are British. People ‘fetch us’ from workshops; we live in a ‘flat’, not a house; we don’t leave, we ‘depart’, students attend ‘uni’ (why use 10 letters when you can just use 3, right?) Sadly, no one speaks in a British accent…


Something pretty consequential happened yesterday. I may look back at this one day and see it as a defining point in my life. My big toenail fell off! It was an inevitable end to a basketball injury that happened last month. But really, who needs toenails in Malaysia anyway?!

Mills, Thode and Other Tales from our Flat!

I am writing this entry from my flat in Malaysia. It’s incredibly hot and humid, pushing nearly 40 degrees Celsius. I straighten my hair at night and with the humidity, end up with perfect curls in the morning – it’s fantastic!

The flat is starting to feel more like home. It’s a simple house with basic amenities. There’s no air conditioning, no laundry, no hot water. But it does have character, history and wonderful people – and it’s beginning to fill with the most amazing memories. Smiles and laughter top running water any day!

The view of our flat from the outside.

My bedroom.

The other interns that I live with are the epitomy of nice. There are currently 5 of us living in the house -- Ingrid from the Netherlands, Hana and So-Young from Korea and Soraya from Austria. We're expecting 2 more interns from Canada this week and a couple more next month.

Ingrid, Hana, Soraya and So-Young, after a night swim at a nearby pool. The pool is conveniently located in the heart of the student housing complex, right beside Taylor's University College. A swimming pool in the student slums, seriously?!

Ingrid is etching to go to the world renowned jungle in Perek. If you can’t go to the jungle, then why not bring the jungle to you? If Mohamed can’t go to the mountain, then you bring the mountain to Mohamed, right? (edit: Mommy, did I finally use this in the right context?). Our flat has become home to an extraordinary bunch of creatures. We wake every morning to the sound of howling dogs and screeching crows. There’s also a white cat that has staked his territory in our front yard and a lizard that has developed a liking towards our living room. I’ve named them Mills and Thode, respectively, after the libraries at McMaster. Mosquitoes and flies are everywhere! So long as there are no deer…

I will be delivering my first two HIV/AIDS workshops tomorrow. The first one is at a secondary school in Klang, which is about 40 minutes away from Subang Jaya and the second is at a college in Kuala Lumpur. Super duper excited!

The Day I Followed the Sun...

Hello, from Malaysia! As you know, I’m doing an HIV/AIDS internship this summer in Subang Jaya, Malaysia. Most of you also know that the single most terrifying part of the experience for me was just getting here. A 15 hour flight to Hong Kong, then a 4 hour flight to Kuala Lumpur then tacking the KL public transit system to get to the town of Subang Jaya. Far is driving to Roshima’s house. Flying halfway across the world…simply petrifying!

I did indeed make it safely, and quite effortlessly too. I keep wracking my brain as to how time flew by so quickly (no pun intended!) For future reference, I’m hoping to patent this strategy and sell it to any student stuck in a 3 hour evening lecture, where time seems to stop altogether. I’d be a millionaire! Phase 2 of this ingenious strategy is to find Prince Charming and settle down in a castle somewhere far far away...

I’m convinced the passing of time was due to the movie selection provided by Cathay Pacific. From Bridewars to the Lord of the Rings to an array of Bollywood flicks (surprisingly none of which I had heard of -- incomprehensible given my extensive background in the genre!), it took me half the flight to figure out what to watch. The paradox of choice.

Or perhaps, time passed by so quickly because of the sheer amount of food provided by the airline. Every hour, an attendant came by with something to eat – pasta, chicken and rice, cup noodles, banana bread, chocolate biscuits, an apple. You’d think the asian population would be beyond obese by now. The best part was that it was served by a flamboyant male airline attendant with perfectly shaped eyebrows and very tight pants. Brilliant.

By hour seven, I had resorted to playing a new game. It was affectionately known as the “count the number of swine flu masks game”. I actually deliberately got out of my seat and toured the aircraft just to get a better estimate. I lost count after the eighteenth mask. The swine flu scare also necessitated my temperature be checked before I could clear immigration in Kualu Lumpur. I passed with flying colours – if there were a grading system for passing a fever test, I’d get a 12 hands down!

Daddy-o, I pulled a you! There was this super cool view of outside from the aircraft – some sort of nifty camera that passed real-time images of the surroundings to your personal tv monitor. Costa Fortuna boat camera reprised, really. I checked at hours 2, 4 and 6…the screen was completely white, inevitably because of the clouds. I didn’t bother to check again at hour 8!

I think it really boils down to one thing – the sun. With the length of the flight and the 12 hour time difference, I left Friday morning and reached Hong Kong on Saturday afternoon, totally bypassing the night. I followed the sun and it followed me for 15 splendid hours…it was beautiful! Shakespeare once wrote, “…and it must follow, as the night of the day…” Clearly, Shakespeare’s never travelled to Malaysia..

The rest of the trip flowed seamlessly. I was picked up at the train station and taken to the trainee flat. There, I met two interns from Korea, one from Austria and one from the Netherlands – all of whom I have the distinct pleasure of working with this summer.

At this, I shall say good night! Or if you’re in Toronto, good day! Or in London, good evening! Either way...

HAPPY MOTHER’S MOMMY!!